Every day is Mother’s Day

The mother-child relationship is the purest relationship in the world. In the recent years it became a fad to celebrate Mother’s day. I often wonder why Indians are so enamoured by the ways of the West.

In the western world, youngsters leave home in their teens and fend for themselves. Mother’s day is a designated day for them to come and meet their mothers once in a year. They may even skip the trip and just send a bouquet of flowers with a ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ greeting card. The day, and many others akin to it, have been popularised by those for whom this was a business proposition. Innumerable cards, flowers, teddies, chocolates etc. are sold, the world over on these days. If you look closely, they have nothing to do with our culture but have just been copy-pasted on our psyche.

Contrarily in the Bhartiya culture, mothers look after their children much beyond their growing up. I would say that mothers look out for their children forever. I remember a time when my Dadi told my mother , “Madan lissa ho gaya hai. Eh nu changi khuraak deya kar!” (Madan -my father, had lost weight and was looking weak, so she should give him a better diet) We all had a good laugh because my Dad was always overweight! But mothers are mothers!

Mother’s love is pure. It doesn’t need to be posted about or glorified on social media. It doesn’t look for gratification because it’s natural and undemanding like a flowing river. It’s suffused in every breath of a mother. It’s lived and felt every day of a mother’s life. Mothers give their all for their children. Their sacrifices for the upbringing of the children have been recognised in our scriptures. Mothers teach their children to distinguish between right and wrong. They are the ones who teach values like honesty, kindness, punctuality, empathy, sacrifice, devotion etc. by setting an example; by walking the talk. That is why the mother is the one who is accorded the first place of reverence. The Taitriya Upanishad says, “Mathru Devo Bhava, Pithru Devo Bhava, Aacharya Devo Bhava, Atithi Devo Bhava.” Meaning: Honour your Mother as God. Honour your Father as God. Honour your Teacher as God. Honour your Guest as God.

Children grow up; get involved with their careers and their spouses. They move on … that’s the way of life. But a mother’s heart always beats for those she once carried in her womb. Mothers are always about giving … there is no ‘take’ in their vocabulary.

In the Bharatiya culture we worship five mothers. These are Deha Mata - the physical mother,

Desh Mata - Mother India,

Dharti Mata- Mother Earth,

Gau Mata - Mother Cow,

and Veda Mata - The scriptures and the feminine form of Divinity.

Bhartiyas are the only ones that revere their country as a mother. Did you ever hear of Mother America or Mother Canada? We adulate five mothers, because they nourish us selflessly.

Motherhood brings great joy but it also brings great responsibilities. Our scriptures propound that responsible motherhood begins, not when a child is born; it begins when the thought of conceiving a child is born. It means that a women should be in good mental and physical health before she conceives. If she is not, the same shortcomings would likely be there in the child to come.

Sri Sathya Sai Baba says, “If one's mother is unhappy, all the expenditure one incurs and all the worship one offers in the name of Durga, Lakshmi and Saraswathi in the Navaratri festival will yield no fruit. Even in the ancient teachings about the persons who are to be revered as Gods - mother, father, teacher and guest - the first place is given to the mother, when it says, ‘Mathru Devo Bhava’. Even in our casual talk we say mother, father, teacher and God. God is relegated to the last position but the mother is given the first place. This reveals the attitude of Bharathiya culture towards women in general and the mother in particular. It is the mother that holds the child by the hand and teaches him how to walk. It is the mother that feeds the child and teaches it how to eat. It is again the mother that teaches the child how to utter meaningful sounds and speak. Thus the mother is one's foremost teacher.”

Maa ke haath ka khaana, was a delicacy in our childhood. Maa here would include grandmas too. I still remember my Nani’s paranthas and my Dadi’s halwa. My mother would make the best Matar-paneer, Zeera-alu, pakoras etc. She was much ahead of her time and would bake healthy cakes and desserts for us. Her 5-star dishes were homemade Gulab jamuns and Trifle pudding. In those times, we too ate with abandon. There was no calorie counting. The calories would get burnt in the normal course of play.

Much as I understand the demands of the working mothers of today, it would be nice if they would find time to feed, cuddle and connect with their babies. Our mothers fed us with their own hands. However busy they were, they always found time for their babies. Feeding time is the best time to bond with children.

In the present day pace of life, with professional commitments, social commitments, social media … taking a toll on time, mothers have lesser time for their babies. This is what happened in the West too. And the family as a unit of togetherness and commitment to each other, got eroded. When the mothers stopped bonding with the children, they started bonding elsewhere.

Motherhood is precious. If you are lucky to be a young mother, enjoy every moment of it. Give your best to your babies, because they are your most valuable property. It’s important to make proper-ties, they are far more valuable than properties.

And if your mother has passed on to the other side, remember that a mother never really dies, she remains alive in your smile, in your thoughts, in your demeanour … and a part of her is alive in your siblings too!

In the Bhartiya culture, we do not really need to celebrate Mother’s day, because we look after our mothers each day, till the end. They have looked after us and we can never repay the Matri-rinn! We don’t meet them just once in a year. They are a part of us, just as we are a part of them. For us, each day is mother’s day.

In the Bhagwad Puran it is stated that when Kaliyuga is at its prime, mothers shall overindulge children such that they shall be spoiled rotten and shall not be able to do the simplest things for themselves, neither would they respect the parents who have given them everything. Sadly, we see this all around, more so in the affluent sections of society. Let us raise responsible children who are assets, not burdens to the society and the nation. Let the innate essence of motherhood stay alive. Happy Mother’s Day!

This piece had been published in The Daily Guardian on 10.05.2025. It can be viewed here https://epaper.thedailyguardian.com/view/2413/the-daily-guardian/6

I would be happy to know your thoughts about this :)